hi, its been a while, but am back here to say that the gambelling has not stopped. I got him to go to a GA meeting which he asked me to do. he went 1 week which was last week. He said he was glad that he went and it has openend is eyes and will carry on going. He wouldnt be able to do everyweek cos of his hours. Last night  he had time to go but chose not to as he had to be up in the morning at 5 and the meeting did not finish till half 11 at night. In my eyes he should have gone if he really wanted to. Anyhow the asking for money as not stopped. and im now at my wits end. bills arem not being paidv etc. Im very unhappy in myself and am very depressed and i dnt want my children to oick up  on that. I have asked him 2 leave but last tie when i did this i changed my mind....I have now asked him again and do not want to change my mind. Im scsred to be on my own tho as I have 4 children now and if he goes then my freedom hoes with him as i have no family around to help or anything like that, i will be by  myself. I do not want to be by myself. Im scared of being alone with my children and not  being able to do anytjing. I also  know this is a reason to keep him around if im not happy

 I just really dnt knw what to do and feel so isolated......I feel writing it here im talking to some1...

k xx

Hi K

Sending you some hugs ((((K)))))

I know how hard it is to look after children on your own but you know,you can do it and you will be able to cope.Sometimes the actual thought of it is worse than the actual reality of it,if you know what I mean?

When me and my ex broke up I had 6 children,tho 3 of them were teenagers.

Are you able to confide in your health visitor? She should be able to offer support and point you in the right direction for toddler groups and stuff like that where you can make new friends and chill a bit.

Also ask her for details of the Sure Start scheme,the councils are building up childrens centres all over so hopefully there will be one in your area:

http://www.dcsf.gov.uk/everychildmatters/earlyyears/surestart/surestartchildrenscentres/childrenscentres/

I think maybe your DH is taking advantage of the fact he thinks you don't mean about him leaving and therefore continuing his behaviour.

Have you set him a date to go by? It might be the wakeup call he needs?

You and your children certainly deserve a better life than the one you have now hun.

Let us know how it goes.

Stay strong! xx