My girlfriend has been secretive about her phone since before xmas. She fell asleep last night and I had a look at her messages and found out she's been seeing someone else - her boss at work. She's this 'straight' little wannabe.

I've been suss about it for weeks, but she kept telling me I was being paranoid and she was allowed to have friends! I've been babysitting our kid while she's off out drinking with this troglodite bitch from hell. I feel sooo used and stupid and angry and hurt.

She said they slept together once, which was a nite she went out with work and stayed out all nite, telling me they shared a bed but nothing happened. Like a tw*t, I believed her. She reckons they only slept together that time, but have been texting non-stop since, going out and getting up to who know's what.

She said it was over (some txts were from that day, saying get to work early so I can get you in the loos before the other staff get there) so that's crap.

She was hysterical last night, begging me not to leave her, saying I'm the one she loves and she wants nothing to do with her, she's sorry etc. Then she's all 'poor me' "oh I've lost you haven't I?" expecting me to go "no darlin, it's fine!"

I walked out, her crying, me crying, our kid crying. I went to a mate's and got p***ed. I don't know what to do. We've been together 4 years and I do love her. Lately, over the past year, she's been selfish and unsupportive of my needs, no matter what I do to support hers in every way I can. She's always been a bit selfish, that's just her, but it's gotten so she's taking me for granted. We were working that out and things had been good for the last few days finally. Then I read the phone and it's all a mess. Our kid's only 5, she's gonna think I've left her. I love them both so much, I just wanted a normal supportive relationship. She was 'bored'. So was I but I was trying to make changes, not find some tart to fool around with!

Now she's full of regret. It's not often she's the one chasing me. Mind you, she'll soon get fed up. I don't know if she'd take a risk for me, go the distance, prove herself to me without knowing if we'll ever get back together. Right now, I don't trust a word she says. She's obviously around the trog cos that's her boss.

After here, I'm going to the phone box to warn the trog off. Can't take this lying down, gotta stand up for myself.

As if I didn't have enough to cope with already. I don't know if I can handle this folks.

'Chelle
xxx

I just wanted to say that we are all here for you. I know how s*** it is being cheated on by someone you love and someone you thought had the same respect for you as you do for them. My fiance and I split up in Novemeber and I was absolutely heartbroken. I decided to try and work things out with him, but it turned out he hadn't finished seeing her all along (v long story). I am still getting over it now but I found that everyone on this board was really helpful and supportive and made me feel miles better.

It's a really crap thing to have to go through and you are the one that has make all of the decisions about where you want to go with your gf now; I imagine it will be especially hard for you as you have your daughter to consider in all of this too. Make sure you look after yourself through all of this, my heart goes out to you, it really does. I hope that you will be able to be strong and come out of this beign as little hurt as possible :) A lot easier said than done I know.

It is doubly hard to deal with this and everything else that you already have to cope with, but you WILL get through it and be able to do it - I surprised myself at how well I was able to do it, I think a lot of the time I was just numb and detached which was my bodies way of coping by shutting off from things. If you feel that contacting 'the trog' then do it if it is going to make you feel better, but be careful you don't end up doing youself more harm than good, I doubt that she will take it lying down either.

You will be able to handle this, you may not always feel that way about it, but you will get through it - I promise.

Take care of yourself...

(((BIG HUGS)))

L
x

(((((((HUGS))))))))

I can't tell you how sorry I am to hear about your girlfriend, I can't imagine how hard it must be.

I always turn to alcohol when I am feeling pissed off and upset. As I find that it numbs the brain, for awhile atleast.

It must feel like youv'e been giving it your all,and getting nothing back, you must be feeling like she has taken you for granted maybe?

I don't blame you for not taking it lying down, as I would be spitting feathers, if it will make you feel, better for venting at trog lolol, you do make me laugh, (I meant that in a nice way) then I think that you should say something.

I really hope that everything works out for you hun,
takecare
love pixie xxxx