Hi

What a nightmare ....

Web design course got cancelled today....because we were unable to log in on the college computers ...typical something to take my mind off things and we couldnt do it...

Art therapy this after noon.....what I did really upset me....to the extent i wanted to leave....I cried so much...I came out of there ready to die....

I spoke to my CPN today and she was ill yesterday....so far enough why i couldnt get hold of her...she was good to me today....and she said we can have a good chat when i see her friday..just have to hang out till then...

All I want to do is die ..I cant get it out of my mind....my hallucinates and paranoia are really bad....

My cpn today asked if i wanted extra support but i said no....what can crisis team do....

I really dont want the day hospital or even a stay in their....

I just want to end it all...this is what i was saying in art therapy....the therapist and i spent alot of time talking ...and i did last the session....i am dreading next week...

I am in a right mess....

Jayne

Jayne,i really hope you are feeling a bit better by now.If i were you i would take all the help that is offered you from the cpn,have you told her about all these bad thoughts you are having?

I know how bad it feels when you're ill and something gets cancelled,feels like the end of the world.You sort of take it personally.With the art therapy,it is meant to bring out these emotions in you hard tho it is,sounds as if you really respond to it so try not to be frightened of it,ive done it myself while i was in hospital.

Let us know how you are.

Ali xxxx

Just sending some hugs Jayne and my kits send your kits purrs. My poor things were so bothered last night. Couldn't understand why I had shut them in for a start and both hated the noise. Little girl thought the sparkly lights were nice though.

Try not to get too stressed out about the art therapy. It is therapy after all and many people get upset during sessions.

hugs and muffins

Huggles Jayne.

I am sorry you are having such a rotten time right now. You maybe should accept the extra support if they offer it. It would be so wonderful to have you well again.

Gentle hugs

Jillxx