Hello everyone, please excuse my just jumping in!

It's been suggested that I post on here to help deal with the stress of looming redundancy. I've known since february last year that my job was going; a job incidentally that I've loved, but I've only just found out anything concrete about when I actually get to leave. I hate what's going on with a passion, I feel like I'm looking at an open grave.

It's not totally bad, I'm getting a decent amount of support, but I just can't seem to turn my thoughts away from what I'm losing, particularly when I'm tired. I know I have a lot of skills and I'm highly employable, but I'm still scared that I'll struggle to find work (why I have no clue).

I need to stop thinking about this for now, but now that I know I can come here maybe I can get my mental state beyond the loss and on to what is coming, which in all honesty at the end, is still going to be good.

Thanks for your time

Hello Oliverandjewelsmum and welcome to the board,

Having been through this myself I can empathise with you over your feelings in facing this looming redundancy and the waiting is the worst time especially if you have nothing lined up ready and not many do or did when I was going through it all.

There is something we get from the routines in our lives and also those things we have come to rely on and believe will always be there such as our jobs. When we have been in a place for a good while it becomes a part of ourselves. People often define themselves by the jobs they do which shows how ingrained it becomes. So to lose this stability can be extremely unsettling and is very much like a bereavement.

You know you are facing a time of great upheaval and adjustment and would really have preferred not to go through all this. So on that side of things it feels like being robbed and also being handed something hugely horrible.

Not being able to avoid it and knowing it is coming closer and out of your control will increase your stress quite a considerable amount because anything that affects us that others are in control of really does increase our stress levels.

I posted some information on redundancy on another board which I will retrieve and post on here lower down the page in another folder.

What may help is to think of it all as being less about what you are losing and instead try to think of it as an event in the story of your life. A page is turning and the next chapter has yet to be revealed, plus it has as much or better chance of being a good one as not because of your own abilities.

Hugs
Owly x

From Owly x

"The harder you fall, the higher you bounce."

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Hi Owly

I seem to have turned a bit of a corner this week, I'm not as low in terms of mood and I can face each day, but I'm finding myself unbelievably irritated by the company (that employs me) and by at least some of the people around me.

Most of the people who irritate me are, it has to be said, on the opposite shift to me; but even so my mood seems really odd to me. I wish I understood the psychology of it all a bit better!

In terms of other things I'm able to take care of the things that fall by the wayside when you hit depression again, so that's a relief.

Just wanted to give an update, rather than being someone who shows up and vents and vanishes! It's really helpful knowing this board is here, I must say!

Hi O,
Some of the irritation could be due to having been placed in this predicament in the first place by the company. Not actually having a definite something to have a go at means you're forced to keep hold of it and that can increase your stress.

It might help if you can imagine a cushion or a pillow as representing the company and bash the hell out of it or them for what they are putting you through.

The people on the opposite shift to you, how are they appearing to you ? I mean do they seem to be coping better or on the side of the company etc ? I feel that there will be something about their attitude that is grating on your nerves when you're already on a short fuse through the situation you're facing.

Don't worry about posting here or leaving it a while between times. It's all fine. We don't want to add to your pressures and sometimes it's good to take a break wherever you can. You don't want to be sitting there feeling obligated to post just when you manage to get some time to yourself.

Relax.

Hugs
Owly x

From Owly x

"The harder you fall, the higher you bounce."

CL on :-

Coping with Depression

Overcoming Stress

Paranormal Experiences

Astrology & You

Carers & Cared For

 

Hi Owly

Thanks for those tips, I'll defintinely keep them in mind.

I think the main source of irritation with my counterparts is the perception that they have stopped caring and don't appear to be concerned if they get the work wrong or if they miss the finish deadline. I know well that it's tempting to let my own brain go that way, but I know I would just stop completely and nothing would get done and the quality would be really bad. The whole thing is a major source of stress to both me and my supervisor.

As I said, it's tempting to stop caring myself, but I can't help but be aware that people are still observing behaviour even at this late date and I want the best possible references for my next job applications.

One of the most difficult things to deal with this week was the realisation that I am depressed over this now. I set my housekeys in a slightly different place overnight and couldn't find them in the morning. Bursting into tears while on the phone to my boyfriend was awful for both of us and made me realise that I need to see the doctor for a bit more help than just a hug and a calming chat with friends and family.

Thanks for being here and "listening". It really does help.