Hello,

I am new to this so, here goes...

I need to vent! I can't stand my job anymore because I can't seem to work with the few employees in the office. For the past year, I have try to connect with them to no avail. I have been nice, given gifts, talked, you name it, but I am tired of not getting any response back. I worked in their area one day, and no one even said hello...!

My boss told people that we all work as a team, and is glad we help each other out, yeah right. Wake up!!! That is not happening.

Even the others don't talk to some of the other people. They don't like each other either.

What ever happened to just trying to get along, not really be friends, but co-workers and make the day go faster?

I am hurt I guess. And tired of trying, so I am copping an attitude. Which is not good.

Should you just, smile and try and blow them off or what??? I am keeping track of things they do, and then saying to myself, yeah, you jerk...but then turn around and just want to get someone to talk to me. It's like I keep going back and forth as to what I want from them. Make sense?

I can't find another job, there aren't any out there. So how do I cope daily?

Help, any advise would be helpful.

KH

Hi KH and welcome to the board,
I would have replied sooner but brought my Mum out of hospital yesterday and was a bit pushed for time.

I can completely understand the stress you are feeling as a result of your job. I am wondering if the people you work with have either been there for years and years or are older people. Some people get set in their ways or stuck in the routine of the job and don't really interact much plus if they don't like each other then they may have shut down in order not to cause more trouble and just get on with it all and then go home.

I suspect the longer you are there the more like the rest of them you will become. It is a kind of team but not a good team. It's like some kind of conditioning and training they are putting you through and when you give up and no longer try to be friendly that's probably when they will accept you as one of them, as miserable as they have made you become.

You are obviously someone who has a livelier and more friendly demeanour and it's natural for you to want to raise their spirits to see how good working in your kind of world would be so you keep trying because you are a good person and want the best for them.
You are probably being frustrated by their lack of motivation and the way they have shut themselves off.

They probably can't stand the place and this is rubbing off on you.

All I can suggest is you make your area as lovely for yourself as you can. Are you allowed to brighten it up a bit in any way ?

You might also find that by not expecting a response but talking to them anyway that they eventually come out and join your world a bit more. Might take a while.
Praise is often a good way of making progress with people who aren't happy with their job. So if someone does something good especially if it involves you then I'd simply say so and move quickly on. Don't expect anything back from them, just express your positive opinion and change the subject. Don't give them time to reply, walk away and leave them with it.

If no pressure is put on them to be something they aren't you might just draw them out and by being positive yourself it should prevent you from sinking into the pit they are all in.

Hugs
Owly x

From Owly x

"The harder you fall, the higher you bounce."

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