Hi everyone,

Need some advice really.

Dp and I moved into our new house a couple of weeks ago. Both sets of neighbours came round and introduced themselves and are both lovely. The house was in quite a state, especially the gardens, so I took to those with a pair of loppers last week to cut it all back! In my garden, next to the patio door, was a huge overgrown rose bush. I dont like roses, and this thing was a beast, having grown so out of control that it pulled the trellis supporting it off of the wall, and it was so overgrown it was reaching both mine and the neighbours balconies. So I cut it right back (I try not to let my plants invade neighbours garden!) However, just now I have been putting the washing out and overheard my neighbour on the phone in her garden talking about her new neighbours being lovely (ahh) but then she said that she was devastated that we had cut down the rose bush that she had spent 6 years growing up to her balcony (apparantly her the previous tenants used to do the gardens together, and had both planted this bush, but in this garden not her garden!) I feel really bad now, I just assumed this thing, like everything else in the garden, had been left to grow crazily out of control. There is still a huge bush this side, should I offer it to her? I dont want it, the only reason its still there is because I was going to dig it up and take it to the tip (the branches were too thick to cut through!) I am just worried that she will think I was eavesdropping her conversation (I genuinely wasnt, she was only the other side of a wooden fence is a small quiet garden!)

I really hate upsetting people

Stephie

 

 

 

Hi stephie

Please, please please don't work yourself up over this in to more than it needs to be. You have done nothing wrong for a start. If the roots of the bush are in YOUR side of the garden, then the plant is YOURS to do with what you will. In fact, as far as I understand it, even the parts of the bush which grow in to your neighbour's garden still belong to you. If she was ever to choose to cut it back, to folllow the strict letter of the law she should hand back the prunings to you! lol!

However, I can see that what has bothered you here, is not who's in the right or who's in the wrong, but how upset your neighbour may have been. If you REALLY want to make amends for your neighbours hurt feelings you need to chat about it with her (which may also include admitting to overhearing yourphone conversation). BUT remember you didn't know about this cosy arrangement they had and shouldn't feel AT ALL guilty about unintentionally removing the bits she was growing up her walls. Just empathise with her sorrow and say something like, "if you had told me I would have left it alone". TBH, if she wated to continue the arragement SHE shoud have said something first I'm afraid. There's no good her crying about spilt milk when she could have prevented this by keeping you in the loop! After all, you're not psychic!

Why not buy her a rose plant of her own for a few quid which will go down REALLY well as a good neighbour present, but save you from having to consult her in future every time you want to trim your side?

And DON'T feel guilty! lol!