Hi.

   I'm not sure what to do - there is this service at church - a memorial to the departed, and the last couple of yrs i've been with my family to remember mum who died in 2006. This yr is different tho, as my uncle died in may, so I want to go to remember his as well. But christmas is coming up and I know i'll get down then, and I don't want to go to the service as it'll make me down as well, and this is the 1st yr without anti depressants so i'm trying to stay up, but if I don't go i'm not sure if i'll feel better or worse. Sorry, ranting now. It just hurts too much.

Hi,

I think maybe the best thing to do is to leave your choice to the last moment but don't stress yourself thinking about it until then. A choice you make today might not be what you want to do tomorrow so maybe play it by ear. Also, just because you do 't go to a memorial service doesn't mean you have forgotten people. I don't go to special services but I light a candle and have my own memorial at home. You need to do what is best for you.

Try not to think about christmas yet. Take it slow and try and deal with things as you reach them. It does help.

Gentle hugs

Jillxx