Im so frustrated just now, Alex is 25 weeks (20 weeks corrected) and weighs 13lb. He was 12lb 1oz at the begining of september. My HV has started moaning that he isnt putting on enough weight. They want me to wean him even though he is settled, ok he feeds more than he used to but hes always been tiny and lost a LOT of his birth weight to begin with. He also cries a LOT and is unsettled a lot of the time. We're also pretty sure he has a milk allergy as his brother had similar problems and then went on to developing severe nappy rash and he also gets blotchy faces and an upset stomach when he has more dairy than he can handle.

1st of all i feel like i dont get listened to, iv said for WEEKS he isnt right but no they just fob me off and now they are moaning at me for him not putting on enough weight.

Next, my HV said that he NEEDS to be weaned, as breastmilk isnt as good after 6 months because your body knows the baby is being weaned so i have to give him vitamin drops to ensure hes getting all he needs.

Now i dont want to wean Alex yet, ok he wakes more than he used to during the night but he settles down and he doesnt seem to be hungry after a feed, he just like chomping down on things as he is teething which my HV thinks means he is hungry (he also is a champion dribbler).

They told me he HAS to have carbs to help him gain weight and i have to give him baby rice at least once a day. she said dont bother going to the hassle of using EBM to mix it with, but cant use formula so its just water... surely this wont help his weight much? he also isnt interested in eating off a spoon but really loves having a good chomp on the spoon! PLus is there any reason WHY i cant try BLW with him? My HV seemed to be horrified when i mentioned giving him whole veg and quickly handed me a leaflet on how puree'd food should be for a baby his age!!!

They are referring him to the dr (he has been seeing paeds in our local hospital due to being prem but they havn't mentioned anything about his weight ever!) about his weight and want him re-weighed next wednesday (he will be 6 months exactly then) but i really dont think he needs anything else yet and was planning to start BLW on the 11th.

Im also going to try him with colief to see if that helps his tummy and settles him down and carry on doing our colic massage routine.

Sorry for the long rant im just really sick of being told that breastfeeding my son seems to be causing more problems than the "breast is best" bit.

Love
Stef, Matthew and Alexander

Sorry quick reply as moany baby, but ARGH to HV!!!

It sounds like he doesn't need to be weaned and that you're happy with BF at that frequency, and baby rice with water (WHAT???!!), go back next week and challenge her on the ZERO calorie benefit of that versus lovely fatty breast milk!

Hugs,

Ax

p.s. If you'd like to BLW, go for it! He's more like to get iron from sucking on bits of broccoli than baby rice!!
p.p.s when is your next Paeds appointment? May be worth while speaking to them.

Hi,
I don't post here but do lurk now & again. And I had to reply to this!

My son was also prem, but was born @ 24+6 weeks so a lot earlier than your LO.

However, I expressed for him for the whole 17 wks he was in hospital and then brought him home fully b/f. My HV was, and still is the same. She tried for 5 months after getting X home for me to give him formula, and to wean him. We got him home weighing 6lb 1oz, and she wanted me to wean him? I stuck to my guns though and didn't, until I knew he was ready, which was when he was 8 months (actual) or 5 corrected. She did get her way with the bf though and I gave up when he was 8 months. One of the biggest regrets of my life as we found he had dairy allergy which is a nightmare. And now that he is on special formula, I still got told he wasn't putting enough weight on. You can't win. Needless to say I no longer see that HV.

Anyway, I just wanted to say do what YOU feel is right. You know best. I'll bet your HV has no experience of prems. And sorry for hijacking your thread!

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Hi

Can't comment on the allergy stuff really as I haven't dealt with it, but I just wanted to say I completely agree with you on the baby rice with water idea. If your baby is 'struggling' to gain, what is the point of putting empty bulk into them, definitely take every opportunity with solids to sneak meaningful calories into them. If YOU find expressing to make up baby rice a faff, then maybe consider using a formula that you think is appropriate with your allergy risks, but steer clear of water.

I've always weaned my babies early, this is what I have felt is right for my boys. I HATE the pressure that HVs put on you to wean at a set date - nothing else in a baby's life is by date (no-one tells you that your baby must have 2 teeth by a set date), you need to make that judgement knowing your baby, not on some random day. I do know that most HVs will say 'don't worry about it' if you wean before 6 months, but if you want to leave it later than 6 months, they suddenly start telling you your baby will never learn to eat solids properly, blah blah blah!!! All utter rubbish.

Trust your instincts.
Tamsin

Hi

Some HV's really are in the wrong job arent they, you know your baby best so i would just go with what you feel is right but i do have to say that baby rice and water (WTF) this cannot be as good or better than breastmilk.

I have spoken to a number of HV's about BLW and a few have been honest and said that they dont really know enough or had experience to advise properly and others have said that they like the idea of it but to ensure enough calories they feel that both methods of weaing should be used (ie a few teaspoons of mashed food alongside some finger foods and also give baby a spoon to try the mashed themselves) but you have to do what you feel is best.

I dont like using thingd like baby rice and have been advised that ready break or wheatabix is fine as a first food

HTH

Gem