Hi All

Well as per my last message the social worker wheels are still turning however things are going a little bit down hill and it has upset me so much i dont really feel like going on. Its playing on my mind so much it im driving my family and friends crazy.

A long story sorry but i'll make it as short as possible, Our SW thinks are dog is too excitable and bounds round the house to much. He's not a particular big dog and is a Heinz 57 Cross not a viscous bone in his body but as he was a rescue dog needs lots of reassurance and kisses. I have to admit for the last 4 years he has had complete run of the house, sofas upstairs etc and i have to agree with the SW limiting some of that freedom is not such a bad thing so we are busy jumping through her hoops, putting up baby gates to restrict the dogs access to certain rooms when we're eating etc, telling him off when he barks and growls at people in the front street as the pass our house, and we are desprately trying to teach him the word bed so that he will go and lie down as he just sits at the baby gate and present and just whines. This is the only issue that is really really getting too me and to top it off the SW said she is struggling to imagine 1 childin our care with the dog the way he is let alone the 2 children we want. I am so mad and i really wasn't expecting it, he is not a bad naughty or viscous dog so i really dont understand. So on top of all these changes we have to pay for a dog trainer and possibly an Dog Assessment £85. In anyones experience will an assessment help? Im guessig and hoping as it is a professional report on our dog stating that it is friendly and palcid the SW will have to accept this. I foolishly said that our dog also had cross staffordshire terrier in him some generations down the line and straight away the SW wrote it down and said that she would have to consult with her line manager about the Dangerous Dogs List. And then to top the whole lot off she said if she doesn't see an improvement in the dog then would we consider rehoming him. Obviously i saiid yes we would consider it but my real answer is NO. As much as i desperately want and long for a child/children i took on a responsibility with my dog and i love him dearl and will not give him up, I guess im not destined to be a mum!!!

Has anyone come across this, i really think our SW is taking this to the extreme and it really has me upset and i making me ill with worry. Our SW is happy to carry on with the homestudy as she seem confident things will change either the dog or us or we will eventually just rehome him. She says she is a dog/pet lover but she seems to be finding every little picky point with the dog. Is she just testing us?

Please please help

Little Miss

Hi Little Miss.

This is dreadful!! How could she possibly suggest you might rehome the dog? Is she saying you should rehome your adopted children-to-be if they become difficult? GRRRRRRRR. She obviously has a problem with dogs that she won't admit. Your dog is one of the most important things that will help your children to settle. They will be able to tell him their troubles when they can't tell you. I had 6 large dogs when i gave birth to my son (thank goodness i wasn't adopting at that point!lol!) and my mum was worried about how I would cope, suggesting that I should reduce the number. I still feel grateful to the district nurse who reassured her that of course I would cope . And cope we did, no problem. Of course i never left our son on his own with the dogs, though this was more for their benefit than his. I agree that the baby gates are a good idea, but as for him bouncing about, children bounce about too. I think that your idea of having a proffessional assessment of your dog is good too. Even if your sw calms down, you never know who will be on the adoption panel and what hangups they will have. The assessment in black and white will surely carry weight.

Please don't let all this put you off, it is just one of the many hurdles we have to jump in our route to adoption. You CAN get through this. Try to keep calm, and enjoy the dog training classes. After all, it won't do the dog any harm to be better trained, indeed it will probably make him feel more secure. It is also another plus in your favour that you are willing to take advice and put effort into making your home just right for your children to be. Oh the joy of jumping through hoops!

Helen x

ps we had three large dogs when we adopted, but our sw was a dog owner.

I don't think your SW is being unreasonable tbh, their main concern is the children that may be placed with you. As a mother, without a moments hesitation my kids come first so I would rehome any animal if it was in their interest.

However, it sounds as though a bit of firm handling on your part with your pet will solve the problem so try not to worry too much. And I am sure that any chilldren placed with you would love having a dog around.