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| Discussion Title: | Reducing night bfs |
| Emoticon: |  |
| Message #: | 3702.1 |
| From: | blackalice  |
| To: | ALL |
| Date: | 1-Nov 19:56 |
| Replies: | 5 |
| Message: |
Holly will be 2 next week and has always loved her milk. She co-slept fulltime until 18 months, and from then on does a few hours in her own room before coming through to us for the rest of the night from 10ish. She feeds constantly - on every stirring. Although I'm happy for Holly to still feed a few times a night we've come to the conclusion that the current 8-10 times is just not manageable. It causes relationship issues, bad moods, far from perfect parenting for both her and DS and is just not in anyone's best interests. So last night I only fed her 4 or so times. The other times involved me saying no and having to cuddle her through her loud protests and attempts to rip my top off and an awful half hour of Rich trying to settle her in her bed whilst she screamed for me. It was so hard not to go in and feed her, but I know this has to change for all our sakes. She was being held and comforted by her daddy, not left to cry it out, and did eventually tell him to get onto her bed with her and then settle to sleep happily for another couple of hours. It is so hard though. I don't think I'm really asking for anything now I've come to write this! I just needed to say it somewhere I wouldn't be seen as an idiot for letting her still feed so much in the night at 2. When she first moved into her own bed at 18 months she had a few weeks of going from 7-10, then 10-2 or even 4am. She didn't get her first tooth until 15 months and is still teething badly now though which sent it back to hourly or less feeds which she just can't seem to get out of. I think she sees bf as essential if she ever stirs which we need to break. DS used to be the same (despite being FF) but now at 3y7m only gets up once or twice for a wee or drink. I don't think I can wait another year though (he improved just before 3 years) as things are really at breaking point exhaustion wise and at least with DS not being bf either of us could deal not just me. Sorry for the essay. I just needed to vent! Thanks ladies :) love Beck xxxxxx
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| Discussion Title: | Reducing night bfs |
| Emoticon: |  |
| Message #: | 3702.2 in response to 3702.1 |
| From: | nenuphar  |
| To: | blackalice |
| Date: | 1-Nov 20:26 |
| Replies: | 5 |
| Message: |
HI Beck
((((HUGS))))
It isn't easy is it when youhave to make this kind of decision? I did the same with Mylo a few months ago, he was much younger than Holly at nine months but I was exhausted and as you say it was affecting my parenting abilities, it had become a habit to feed every time he stirred and I, liek you, decided that for everyones sanity (even the dog had bags under her eyes) it had to stop.
Mylo was younger so it was quicker, but like you it was daddy that rocked him to sleep (I believe this is kinder as it seems a bit cruel for mummy to do it with her milky smell?) and it took Mylo two nights and now if he asks for milk in the night he is either tetthing or poorly otherwise he sleeps through.
I just wanted to share my experience with you and say that you have to do what is best for you, if you are exhausted and having relationship troubles then you have to act and Holly will be just fine, please don't worry or feel guilty.
(((((HUGS))))
Kate xxx Mylo xxx Crumpet xxx
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| Discussion Title: | Reducing night bfs |
| Emoticon: | |
| Message #: | 3702.3 in response to 3702.1 |
| From: | orchid  |
| To: | blackalice |
| Date: | 1-Nov 21:22 |
| Replies: | 5 |
| Message: |
Sending you hugs and encouragement. I hope that the transition is at least a quick one and you won't have many unhappy nights. My 2 boys also wake about that frequently, and I have spent a long time trying to decide what to do.
Hugs to Holly too, and lots of luck.
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| Discussion Title: | Reducing night bfs |
| Emoticon: | |
| Message #: | 3702.4 in response to 3702.1 |
| From: | cl-turquoise_lisa  |
| To: | blackalice |
| Date: | 1-Nov 21:57 |
| Replies: | 5 |
| Message: |
Good luck Beck - I hope she gets used to it quickly (and gets those teeth over and done with fast too!)
Lx
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| Discussion Title: | Reducing night bfs |
| Emoticon: | |
| Message #: | 3702.5 in response to 3702.1 |
| From: | yuffie  |
| To: | blackalice |
| Date: | 2-Nov 22:15 |
| Replies: | 5 |
| Message: |
Good luck with the night weaning Beck.
Anna was the same, wanting a BF everytime she woke up, I used the NCSS techniques to gradually reduce the number of feeds (Pantley Pull-Off, etc). When Anna was around 21 months I explained to her that she was a big girl now and didn't need to feed at night, we actually got down to 3 feeds a day (early morning, morning and evening). Then she self-weaned at 26 months when I was pregnant with George.
Hope you get some sleep soon!!!
Daryl xx
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