Hi ladies

My DS1 Jeremiah was 3 in July and isn't potty trained yet.  I've bought all the books, read websites etc and personally I don't think he's ready. My health visitor, DH and MIL have been nagging me to train him for ages so this summer we bought 2 potties and loads of pants which he chose.  He doesn't seem to be aware if he is wet and if I ask him if his nappy is wet he always says no.  We use mostly coth nappies which I thought would make him more aware of when his nappy is wet but apparently not.  My HV said to just go for it with the potty training so we tried that and Jeremiah was quite happy to wear his pants and sit on the potty but he never did anything in the potty, he just wet his pants over and over again.  He wouldn't come and tell me when he was wet and he didn't seem to realise he was, the only reason I could tell was by the smell or if he sat on my lap with wet pants.  I'm not cross with him when he wets his pants.  I just say never mind, lets clean it up and remind him that he needs to tell me when he's wet next time.  I suggest to him that he goes on the potty when I go to the loo which he does quite happily but doesn't do anything.

I decided to leave him for a couple of months before trying again although I'm feeling the pressure to get him trained as he is going to school in september.  This morning I got a letter from the hv saying I need to bring Jeremiah for his going to school development check where they send the results to the school he'll be going to.  I thought this was meant to be done in June/July as he's not going to school for another 10 months and that's a long time for a child his age.  One of the questions on the list she sent was does your child wet/soil the bed or have accidents during the day.  I dread having to tell her that he still wears nappies full time.  Has anyone got any advice?  Or has anyone else got a child Jeremiah's age still in nappies as I feel like I'm the only one.  DH was trained really late and he was still wetting the bed at 12 years old and I'm not sure when he was dry in the day, maybe 4 or 5 so I'm wondering if it's genetic.

 

Thankyou Elena for my siggy

 

Hi Sophie, I have 2 little girls.  I potty trained them both by using the Gina Ford methods in "potty training in one week".  Have you heard of this?  Or tried it?  Both my girls were trained within the week.  With my youngest we went on to have a few poo problems.  I have been reading her a book called "potty poo poo wee wee" every night and she has been back on track for the last two weeks. 

Your health visitor should be helpful if you chat to her.  If you do try Gina Ford do not give up after a few days!  It does take a good 5-7 days.  Expect accidents and stay at home!

Good luck

Bee

If you feel he's not ready then I would wait.  It's not your HV or MIL that will be mopping up the puddles, so I would ignore their 'advice' and just wait a while.  I would read books about peeing in the potty and have a potty around the house to 'practice' with.  My boys both used to sit on the potty before their bath.  Sometimes they would pee, othertimes they would not.  If they did a pee in the potty we would cheer and clap but we didn't pressurise them to 'perform'. 

I too had the Gina Ford potty training book (I don't rate her 'contented baby' books but the potty training one has some good tips in it) but there is no point trying to potty train in a week unless your child is ready.  My DS#1 did it in 3 days (we followed the advice in the book).  My DS#2 wasn't ready (I tried him at 2 and a half the same as his brother) and it just meant I had over a year of puddles on the floor, soggy pants/clothes etc.  If I could turn the clock back, I would wait until he was ready rather than doing it just because the books say he is 'ready' (the correct age). 

Bed wetting can be genetic (my DS, age 6, still wets the bed and I wet mine until I was 12) so it's quite likely that readiness for potty training could be genetic too.  If I were you I'd delay your son's trip to the HV.  He could change so much in 10 months, it seems crazy to do a pre-school check up too soon.  I'm in Scotland so my children didn't start school until age 5.5 so the fact my DS age 4.5 was still regularly wetting his pants wasn't an issue.  There were several children at his nursery age 4-5 still in pull-ups and nobody batted an eyelid.

Let us know how you get on.

Merith xxx

 

CL on Mums Club October 2005 and Mums Due June 2009 and Sleep Problems & Toilet Training

 

Thanks Bee

I tried Gina Ford and we got stuck on the first stage because he never did anything on his potty.  I talked to the HV and she said to go straight to the 7 day plan.  We tried that and we went through 7 pairs of trousers in a couple of hours so we had to stop.  I'm thinking about leaving it for a couple of months and then getting some more trousers so we don't have to give up so quickly next time.

 

Thankyou Elena for my siggy

 

Hi Sophie, I went straight to the 7 day plan.  There had been a potty about in the house before we started but I never did much with it!  We had loads of accidents in the first few days (more so with dd 2).  In the end I had her running about bare bottomed then when I could see her start to wee I could shout "potty" and get her on it!  I'm sure reading her "potty poo poo wee wee" has really helped with the poo issue we were having (basically she didn't like going so was holding it in and then having accidents when she couldn't hold it any more).  She loves the book and I'm sure it helped.

It will be messy!  Stick with it long enough (and it is grim and stressful!) and he will do it.

Good luck

x

Bee