HI all,

I am at the end of my tether with an long ongoing issue (since last year) My husband and I have been together for 13 years and although we had a bit of a spell we went through back in 2007 things are now fine. When we were going through this phase, it was me that approached my husbands mum, I felt he was depressed and I was worried about him, to make a long story short we separated temporarily, his Mum was very supportive towards me that day I was in tear etc etc.. and once we separated I kept my arms distance from his family. Anyhow we worked things out, we got back together, I moved back into our family home and all has been fine since.

The problem seems complex, his mum is very offish with me, she doesn't;t show much affection or concern for my well being. I have recently been in hospital my husband emailed his parents to let them know.. I got nothing.. no emails, no visiting from them ( they don't live far from the hospital) until my husband bumped into his mum on line chat and she asked how I was, my husband I guess is more frustrated about this that he cares to admit because he said he told her, don;t ask me, ask my wife, shes in hospital and she has email. So I got a rather short email, not asking really how I was.. not asking to come visit.. nothing. I am now home and I don;t think they even know as they haven't bothered to ask. We first noticed something was up with his mum when we were on holiday together ( two weeks with my inlaws staying in the same house.. never again!) it was in the morning, she was like a bear with a sore head.. pushing past me in the kitchen when I was making breakfast, not communication and generally being grumpy. So on the last morning I confronted her, we had a problem with something with the house the night before and my stepdad came up in the morning.. we didn't get to the door in time but his mum swore it wasn't my stepdad. I knew it was because I had asked.. so i mentioned it to her in he morning.. saying, by the way it was my step dad that came up early this morning.. she retaliated.. and so no it wasn't so I said, no need to be so grumpy.. and she wasn't too pleased. She'd been showing these emotions not just to me but to her husband ( bless him) and also her son. We all noticed it and just let it go after that. When we got back from holiday ( I came back first Aand hubby had a week with his folks alone) I contacted them to see how they were.. they didn't; bother to respond at all.. since then shes been not very caring and seems to avoid me, yet when we are together for meals and so on she seems ok. It tears me apart.. I have been brought up to belive if you treat someone bad they will treat you back that way.. but I really haven't done anything major and i don't know what is her problem.

Now to be complicated, my husband has an older sister.. the first born and his mum seems to pay more attention to her than to her son, when its Xmas she gets more expensive thoughtful gifts than him etc..the inlaws seem to visit the sister and her husband a lot more and keep in touch a lot more.. whereas we are left to always contact them. My husband tries to remain that he isn't bothered, that saying something will not solve things.. so I've gone along with it, besides they are not my parents.

I personally think its the change of life, shes grumpy and not showing her affection to me..like now with no concern as to how I am or if I am even out of hospital. My husband could have used a bit of moral support.. it was a hard time for him, having to see me in there.. but he got no comfort from his folks. His sister is fine with us.. the mother is fine with the sister all the time.

Does anyone have any ideas, should I speak up or just let sleeping dogs lie?

Thanks for reading and sorry so long !

SkinnyKitty