Hi about four months ago i asked my partner of 7 years to leave due to drugs.  I have a beautiful three year old daughter.  I was doing fine until he told me last week that he has met someone and has been seeing her for about a month.  I am heartbroken this girl has been around the block and has two children one of them the same age as my daughter.  He doesnt seem to care and I live around both him and his new partner.  He hasnt meet her kids and says it will be a long time before he does.  I need to stop thinking about him i know I wasnt happy but why does it hurt so much and why do I want to text him about how hurt I am and how much I hate him.  My head is spinning thinking about them and how could he do this to me when he tells me he still cares about me and that his head is messed up. 

I need to move on but its so hard

Hi there and welcome to the board.

I know it's hard lovey but when you're feeling like this just take a step back and remember what it was like being with him.YOU deserve better,end of.You're doing so well for both yourself and your DD and you need to start giving yourself a pat on the back for doing this on your own.You've done the best thing for both of you.

As for him being with someone else...well,just think that she's welcome to him.Why has he told you this anyway if you're not together?Is he trying to make you jealous?

When I split from my ex H it was five months before started seeing someone and even though the ex knew him there was no reason for me to tell him I was now in a relationship.It was none of his business anymore even though we have 4 children together.Just as it's none of mine that he's on his 2nd relationship since we split up.I couldn't give a monkeys...and lovey,in time,you will feel the same,I promise...

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Hia.

I just wanted to say that what you are feeling is totally natural.  Just because you ended the relationship because of his drugs doesn't mean that you had fallen out of love with him.  You did the right thing as you deserve so much better.

It will take time and a lot of tears but you will get there.  He is probably flaunting his new woman as his pride was hurt as you threw him out and we all know that men don't really do wounded egos very well. 

I was feeling the way you are a year ago and thought I'd never get over it but a year on I am happy and don't give my ex a second thought.  Don't keep telling him how you feel as you just leave yourself opened for him to sucker punch you - accept that you did the right thing for you and your DD and allow yourself to grieve for what you have lost. Whenever you weaken remember the drugs and remember you made the right move.

Love,

thanks for the advice girls I know I did it for all the right reasons and today I am starting to accept its over slept well last night for the first time in weeks.  I am going to get over it and will keep telling myself that both myself and my DD will be happier in the long run.

Thanks a million