Welcome to My Affair! I hope that you will find the support and advice you need here and also begin to give advice of your own. Everyone is welcome to join our little "family", so start posting!

A few people (on and off the board) have been noting a slight change in the tone of this board. It is obvious that we cannot please everyone at once but I would like to outline a few ideas for you all to consider:

~Post Respectfully. If a post upsets or annoys you, sit back and think about what you're going to write back before you submit it. We do not want to control what you say or try to convince you into one way of thinking, however, this IS a public message board which means that your posts will be read by wives and husbands of cheating partners as well as people who are in affairs. If a particular member keeps posting upsetting messages, please remember that you can choose to ignore that member by clicking on their username and selecting IGNORE. Alternatively, if you feel that a post goes against iVillage rules ( http://www.ivillage.co.uk/boards/articles/0,10569,165710,00.html ) then please report the message using the "Report This Message" link which can be found at the bottom right-hand corner of every message.

~Cheaters Guide. Again, this is a public message board but it was designed to support the emotions of those in an affair or who have just left an affair. At no time do we condone affairs (we often advise not starting an affair) but we are happy to offer advice from our personal beliefs and experiences. This board really isn't the place to discuss tactics or tips on having an affair. These types of discussions DO upset many members so please consider this before leaving a post.

~Expect the Unexpected! Often members will leave a post hoping for a lot of sympathy. Contrary to popular belief, we are not about tea, hugs and sympathy here. As I have said, we will offer our advice but it may not always be what you want to hear, so try not to get upset if someone challenges your views. In order to evaluate a situation it is helpful to receive conflicting advice as ultimately, the decisions are yours to make.

~Naming & Shaming. Be cautious about the information you include in your posts. You may not realise how much information you are giving out but if someone were to realise who you are or who you're talking about, you could find yourself in a whole heap of trouble! As much as you can keep names, places, jobs, etc. out of your posts unless you are completely confident that anyone concerned would be more than happy to be identified!!!

~General Board Use. So, what CAN you post about? Well, just about anything! If you fancy chatting about how rough the weather is with your online friends, then do it! If you need to have a good rant about your dog pooping on the carpet - then go ahead!!!! Mostly we see posts about the emotional turmoil people experience whilst in an affair or posts asking for advice on a particular situation. Basically, the only issue we would rather you not discuss is "the rights and wrongs of an affair". That is an issue that could drag on for some considerable time and we would hate to deter people in need of help from posting because they feel they may be judged.
Other boards you may find useful are:
Talking About Relationships: http://messageboards.ivillage.co.uk/iv-ukrlltar
Confession Corner: http://messageboards.ivillage.co.uk/iv-ukrlltar
Coping with Infidelity: http://messageboards.ivillage.co.uk/iv-ukrlbetrayed
Separation & Divorce: http://messageboards.ivillage.co.uk/iv-ukrldivorce
Coping with Depression: http://messageboards.ivillage.co.uk/iv-ukhlcwd
Great Debates: http://messageboards.ivillage.co.uk/iv-ukntdebate
For a full list of the message board on iVillage, point your browser to: http://www.ivillage.co.uk/boards/

Last, but not least, have FUN! No-one here actually knows you, so be yourself and enjoy making new friends! In just a post or two, you'll make new friends and know what is accpetable and what isn't. So, what are you waiting for?! Go forth and post!

Clauds

I wanted to ask...if I set someone to `Ignore' do they realise I have done it?

Emm xx

Not as far as I am aware. I will double check for you but I am 99.9% sure that the other party would not know a thing :O)

Clauds

In December, you took part in a thread about what to buy a MM for xmas.

'Edible Undies???

Just a thought ;O)

Clauds'

People posted on that thread and on others shorty after saying that discussions like that could be seen as promoting affairs, and yet you encouraged it by participating.

What has changed on this board?

JJ.